lush is fine and they have nice soap but going in there is like a minefield of bohemia like if one of the employees doesnt lunge at me asking me if i wanna sample goat lotion or whatever the shit i end up wheeling into some woman dressed in five blankets and knocking the pot of mud out of her hands onto the floor which causes her to scream at an operatic high c for several minutes
My boss doesn’t take me seriously because I’m the youngest in the office by a decade and spend most of my time making his life hell (unrelated problems).
Yesterday he asked me to help him with a problem with a program we use but wasn’t actually listening to me when I tried to help, so it wasn’t working. He asked who the expert on this program was in our office and I told him it was me. He asked who the expert was within the organisation and I told him it was me. He sent me out of his office saying he would call IT to fix it. So I very patiently went back to my desk, where my phone rang a minute later, with IT asking me to help someone who had a problem with the program.
The sheer unadulterated joy I felt making direct eye contact with my manager through the glass wall of his office whilst I answered his phone call will fuel me for WEEKS.
Thinking about becoming one of those awful steampunk rappers except that all my songs are about the actual Victorian era so it’s all shit like “they tell me my workers are a bit too young / but I say they’re middle-aged, on account of the black lung”
“I got rhythm, got flow, got plenty of gumption / coughing blood on the street, call that conspicuous consumption”
